Thursday, January 28, 2010

30 Days of Touching

Day 21: Guiding Hand

Turn about is fair play, right? It was for me today. If you remember my post from last Thursday, then you might recall the title “Flush,” referring to my experience of having a colonoscopy. Well, David had the privilege today.

This time, I experienced the whole procedure from the other direction. I watched the nurse whisk him away. I talked to the doctor and got a good report. And I watched David “wake up” from the anesthetic. The kind used during a colonoscopy is unique. You remain in a twilight sleep so that you can cooperate with the doctor, but afterward you remember nothing. And you continue to remember nothing—even if you are told the same thing seventy times!

What I noticed most about David’s recovery was his insistence that he was wide-awake. The nurse brought him a cup of coffee and he insisted on holding it, even though he kept falling asleep with it in his hand. I would then take it or support it with my hand and he would wake up and inform me that he had it. That scenario continued several times.

Of all my touching experiences today, I am most thoughtful about this one. I played the role of a guiding hand, even though David insisted he didn’t need guidance. Is that how it is with God as my guiding hand? He doesn’t take the responsibility of my life away from me. But he comes, places his hands around the “cup” of my life and supports me. Sometimes I resist; I think I’m more awake than I really am. Yet, he doesn’t consider my orneriness as an offense. He remains faithful.

“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence...If I take the wings of the dawn, if I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me….” Psalm 139: 10

A question for spiritual direction: How do you sense the hand of God guiding your life today? Are you resisting or cooperating?

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