He stood in the foyer of my house, talking with one of my college roommates, and in a moment’s time, my heart tipped toward him. I took him in, in a way I hadn’t before, almost objectively, as I observed his manner, and the way he talked with Marcia (my roommate). I listened to his voice and noticed how handsome he was. He had been my best friend since our sophomore year of high school. However, this day, I looked at him differently and it was this moment that has defined the last thirty years of my life—the day I fell in love with David Booram.
Today we celebrate our 30th anniversary. It hardly seems possible. That sounds like and is a long time. Yet, the prospect of being married 30 more years isn’t out of the question. And far as I’m concerned, that would be just fine! I can’t get enough of this man, though we have spent 30 + years talking, laughing, fighting, playing, and crying together. I would even go so far as to say, we have an exceptional marriage, even a rare one. I don’t know many who have the affection and intimacy that we share, after 30 years of marriage.
One reason is that we have always put each other first. There have been periods where I struggled with placing our four kids ahead of David, but in the end, returned him to the top of my love-list. We’ve preferred one another, over friends and family, and that has kept our relationship the highest priority, next to our relationship with God.
We’ve also enjoyed each other’s company—immensely. We like many of the same things: art, music, hiking, birding, reading, coffee, red wine, and conversation. David is still my best friend and the person with whom I have the most fun! (He has a very quirky sense of humor—just ask his kids.)
We know how to have a good fight, too. Over the years, and even during a time when we were in a very dark place in our marriage, what brought us through was our willingness to talk about hard things without damaging the other person. Oh, we’ve said hurtful things, for sure. But, in general, we’ve learned to be raw and honest, and “go there”, where we needed to go in conversation in order to get to the source of our pain, disappointment, or conflict.
And we’ve had good sex. Bet you didn’t expect me to say that, at least not on my blog! It’s true. Sex is really important to our marriage. Again, we have had lots of pain and difficulty to work through, but we have made our sexual intimacy important. After 30 years of marriage, let me just say, I think we sizzle….and I’ll stop there!
It’s a good thing to marry your best friend. But it’s even better to stay married to him for 30 years. We’ve got somethin’ goin’, and as far as I’m concerned, I’m game for 30 more!